Thursday, July 12, 2007

Drowning on Dry Land

As part of our freshman zoology class, each of us is required to cut open a dead, i.e., preserved in formalin, frog, analyze its anatomy and memorize as many muscles and internal organs as you possibly can in every laboratory sessions. We are given the opportunity to choose our own frogs from a gazillion pieces of poor preserved frogs whose bright futures had been dimmed for the progress of science. In theory, I want my men to be slim, tall and presentable, and they must have a pleasing personality. This is probably the reason why I chose Russell, the baptized name of my unfortunate frog, to become my specimen in that zoology class.

This page is dedicated to the memory of the brave frogs and froggets that gave their lives for the sake of science and our education. We are forever in your debt. This one’s for you.

(This foreword originally appears in this site; www.hoala.org/marine%20biology/frog%20dissection.html. Step-by-step frog dissection is likewise presented in the aforementioned site.)



(Russell Crowe images courtesy of http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1800353749/photo/stills)

Russell was tall and presentable, and he was slim. He has this face that projects a tortured image of an amphibian who is preserved against his will. His face is that of anguish, his eyes scream injustice, almost as if he’ll break out in tears when my scalpel touches his tummy. Though bestiality has never been a preference of mine, I felt a sheer closeness to my new friend, who I never want to part with.

Truly, my choice of men sucks. Slim tall frogs are the least preferred specimens in zoology classes. This is because dissecting them does not show good anatomical details. In zoology, fat, chubby, edematous frogs are always in the A-list of good anatomists.

.

Warning:

.

The following may be too graphic for certain readers. May I suggest that all frog lovers, who may consider dissection to be post mortem mutilation, and are about to view the following, take into consideration the scientific knowledge derived from the deaths of these animals. I love frogs and appreciate their sacrifice. I hold these animals in the most solemn regard and mean no disrespect to the dead. Continue if you feel completely secure with this knowledge.


(This word of caution likewise originally appears on this site; www.hoala.org/marine%20biology/frog%20dissection.html.)


.

Then the cutting portion commences, I took Russell out of the black bag to reveal him bathing in a plastic jar, cold and lifeless. I took him out and pressed his limbs against the board with push-pins. I started dissecting his tummytears flowing down our eyes—until we reach his innards. Then I found multiple tiny black ovoid particles dotted with canary yellow specksit was like ube buchi with sesame seeds (sorry for the comparison). Thence I knew that Russell was really not the man for me.



(Source: www.hoala.org/marine%20biology/frog%20dissection.html.)

For Russell was clearly (homosexual, er…) a female. Yup, Russell was not the Russell Crowe of every woman’s dream, but more of a Keri Russell like in Felicity. During that dissection session, I slashed her tummy as if she’s a bread or something, ripped off her jaw, pierced every muscle of her leg, and skinned his whole body like peeling a banana (in the name of science, of course). And yup, out of rage, I perfected that dissection class; I aced my practical examination; and scored well in my long exams. Then I knew (and learned) that anger is such a good positive motivation.



















Not this Russell.





















But this Russell.

(Russell Crowe images courtesy of http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1800353749/photo/stills. Keri Russell images from www.felicitypage.com)

I love frogs, I really do. Male or female frogs—they’re all the same to me. When we analyze rabbit’s eyes and cat’s testes during microbiology class, I felt nothing but an ecstatic informational orgasm. Though curiosity in our class is highly valued, I think it is temperance that prevailed when I did not ask our professors how they obtained the rat’s spermatozoa in that microscope slide!


(Cadaver picture from http://sitemaker.umich.edu/umpire/umpire_fellowship)

Such events fill me with so much nostalgia. I could still imagine the scent of formalin in our microbiology laboratory. The awry event when a Petri dish containing hemolytic (blood-digesting) bacteria was insufflated in the entire microbiology class. The musky scent of formaldehyde in the anatomy lab as we inspect and pinch human cadavers and wonder why they turned that brown. The way we watch autopsies and wonder if they consented to doing so (hehe). And the way we speculate whose diseased lungs, cancerous uteruses and penises, and aborted fetuses are present in those pretty ornamental glass containers.

And by the look of it, I really do miss nursing school.


(Image from http://www.kufur-kassem.com/cms/images/stories/hand_drowning.jpg)

But as we know, life is not always rosy. Eventually we have to leave the confines of our school, the swamp of learning, and out into the real world, the marshland of existence. We compete, we fend for ourselves, and we provide for our needs. Just like frogs. And yes, even if shallow waters can submerge our minds and spirit, the real quest to stay alive and avoid drowning, even in dry land.


***



The posted images are copyrights of their respective owners and the author does not, in any way, claims the ownership of the aforementioned images. The original links are posted respectively for reference.

64 comments:

Qtheconqueror said...

Wahahaha. You reminded me of the frog dissection pics I still have in my PC maskina nung HS pa siya kinuha.

Poor froggy. Imagine, being given open-chest surgery and being poked without anesthesia and with your heart still beating.

ruff nurse-du-jour said...

I never had the chance to dissect a frog when i was in high school. Sad sad high school life.

I really do love frogs, cats, rabbits, helminths, microbes, etc.--everything that can be dissected in the name of science. That makes me think that maybe I'm more of a psychomotor geek (channeling rocky) than a cognitive/affective one (which I originally believed I was).

If you have the time (and the sanity to do so), posted pictures of dissected animals will be very highly appreciated. Hahaha =)

Anonymous said...

O may gulay. Mukang ayoko na mag med. Hindi ko kakayanin ang cadaver na iyan. Hehe.

gorjess said...

how i miss keri russel

ruff nurse-du-jour said...

Thanks for the visit bino/geno. You have lots of name eh? =)

That cadaver is nothing!! Autopsies are fun (though we're only allowed to watch, and pinch, and touch when med students are doing the actual procedure-->student nurses tend to get a little nosy)!

And I always get to wonder why all of them turned that brown. I think it's because of the oxidation thing. I wouldnt bother to know.

chase / chubz said...

ewww..
we had the froggy dissection in my first year in college..

its was disgusting but bearable.
but the cadaver thing.. too much. hehe

ruff nurse-du-jour said...

thanks for the visit gorjess. =)

i didnt get to like keri russell. i think its because of the hair =) hehehe just kidding.

but russell crowe? well, its a different thing. russell and joaquin phoenix on the first picture brings to mind some ideas not worth mentioning on this site. hahaha.

see you soon miss gorjess =)

ruff nurse-du-jour said...

thanks for dropping by chase! i appreciated the visit.

my first visit to the anatomy lab was soo unbearable. the sight of cadavers (of various ages, sexes, and shapes) lying on the tables plus the distinct aroma of formaldehyde permeating the air (and sticking to your clothes as well) can make you puke.

but imagine passing by that laboratory day in and day out? well, thats just a different story. youll get used to it, and lookie lookie, im now missing it. do i sound gross? hehehe

you can learn alot from them too. especially in legal/forensics medicine =) the dead will invaluably teach the living.

Anonymous said...

i got a news for the identification of key genes for diabetes type 1.

hey, you dont sound gross at all. at least not for me? haha nurse ethics.

hmmm, the smell of cadavers, im starting to be addcited to them, i mean, i am already.

and hey, i love keri russell. them eyes! lovely.

ruff nurse-du-jour said...

yeah, i remember my pedia case report when my prof asked me the etiology of ALL (acute lymphoblastic leukemia) in terms of the genetic translocation on the philadelphia chromosome. THAT was painful!

i think all known diseases have genetic origins. though environmental factors might influence health in one way or the other, if you're not predisposed to that disorder, there is lesser cause for an alarm.

and about the smell of cadavers, id like to call it SWEET INTOXICATION.

thanks for the visit netherchild. hope to see you soon. :)

leeflailmarch said...

LOL. Yet another graphic blog post. Haha. Brings back memories, though a big chunk of my early college memoirs have been repressed already. :D LOL.

ruff nurse-du-jour said...

Hahaha. Thanks for the visit fellow nurse. By the look of it, I know that such memories really bring back forgotten memories of our early nursing yesteryears. =)

(Though I have to admit that such memories are mostly repressed and it took me such quite a long time to bring them back to my consciousness, it was almost a primordial psychotherapy if you would consider it as that.)

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