Sunday, July 29, 2007

Big Girls Don't Cry (2nd of 2 Parts, Conclusion)

After almost half-a-month of converting oxygen into carbon dioxide, a very intimate rendezvous, and yet another failed relationship comes the second part of my most loved musical pieces. Here is the link for first post (to refresh you all) and the top five are as follows:

The Avril Lavigne Collection:

I’m With You

Let Go

Nobody’s Home

Under My Skin

Keep Holding On

The Best Damn Thing

Okay, okay, I know it’s illegitimate to put three songs on a single spot but hey, it’s Avril Lavigne, and whether you admit it or not, I know, yup I know, that you have liked at least one of her cutie smooshie albeit annoying songs.

With Avril’s debut in mid-2002s, identity-challenged and sexually-confused teenagers found an icon in this charming, delightful Canadian pop-rock artist. There starts the ineffaceable era of the proliferation of tomboyish twinks in male neckties, uber-rebonded hair with either blonde or hot pink highlights, black capris and Converse all-stars. Yet we all know, that like our generic liking for skinny jeans, “this too shall pass.”

Notwithstanding Avril’s pop songs Complicated, Skater Boi, Girlfriend, etc., there are really good Avril songs, and I’m With You and Nobody’s Home are good examples. Both exude a sense of loneliness and melancholy, as if there is a feeling of gloom, and rejection, and pain in being alone. It has such a smoky and murky atmosphere, it is dark, almost bordering into suicidal.

While Keep Holding On is the exact antithesis to this enveloping loneliness. It is essentially a song of acceptance, comfort and hope. So not the Avril Lavigne that has a lackadaisical and “I-don’t-care” attitude, but it is always refreshing to hear a different sound from this creative, though always misunderstood artist.

Maybe you’ve also heard…:
I’m With You in Scrubs, Season 3, “My Tormented Mentor”
Keep Holding On in “Eragon”

Most memorable lines:
“Won't you, take me by the hand, take me somewhere new
I don't know who you are but I, I'm with you


“You’re not alone, together we stand
I’ll be by your side, you know I’ll take your hand
When it gets cold, and it feels like the end
There’s no place to go, you know I won’t give in"

Lullaby For A Stormy Night
Waking Hour

In this lifetime I have cried in public three times at most. First when I was coming out of my mother’s uterus. Second when my ex-lover left for the States a few years back. Lastly when my sister, niece and nephews returned to the States a few months back after their vacation here in the
Philippines. Although people think that I’m a hardy, stern, heartless individual and it takes a lot of wringing to extract some tears in my lachrymal glands, I’m really all soft and swooshy inside. An emotional note, a sentimental song, and a touching lyrics is enough to make me cry inside.

In my humble opinion, Vienna Teng is one of the most understated singer song-writer ever. Her songs are lasting, haunting and moving, heartbreaking at times, emotional at most. Brahm’s Lullaby aside, Lullaby For A Stormy Night emanates the same atmosphere of comfort, safety, and tranquility, and it has such an enticing power that one could just unconditionally surrender to the harmony of the song, in the arms of a special beloved.

One could imagine this song being played (a) by a mother holding tender to her child, or (b) by a lover to his loved one, lying together in each other’s arms, or (c) by a forlorn lover whose beloved is far from her presence. Add that to the melancholic sense brought by the pouring rain, and savour the lingering effects of Lullaby’s lyrics in your lonely, private nights.

Maybe you’ve also heard this song in:

You might also like her other songs like:
Gravity, Harbor, Cannonball, Momentum, The Tower, Between & Whatever You Want.

Most memorable lines:

“for you know, once even I was a
little child, and I was afraid
but a gentle someone always came

to dry all my tears, trade sweet sleep for fears
and to give a kiss goodnight”


“Everything's fine in the morning
the rain'll be gone in the morning

but I'll still be here in the morning”

Begin to Hope

There are inseparable things in life.
Milk and Oreo cookies; Yin and Yang; Piolo Pascual and Sam Milby; going to the gym and the inevitable shower scene; Me and credit card debts; and so much more. And then there comes Regina Spektor and the piano. Such a perfect combination, separating one from the other is such plain unacceptable, criminal even.

This song is so intriguing that I dedicated an entire post regarding this song, and Samson’s life (the Biblical creature). I even debated about the identity of the person singing: is it Delilah who “cut his hair myself one night, a pair of dull scissors in the yellow light” or the woman who “loved him first,” where “history books forgot about us and the bible didn't mention us, not even once.” Perhaps it would be best to leave it up to Regina cause “somedays aren’t ours at all.

Samson is all about loving a person unconditionally that one is willing to completely forgive the beloved despite everything he/she have wrongly committed. If listening to this song makes you an official Spektor fan, a YouTube search of Somedays and The Flowers wouldn’t ever hurt.

Maybe you’ve also heard this song in:
An episode in CSI: NY, Season 3.
Pinoy Big Brother, Season 2, Wendy and Bruce’s scenes.

Most memorable lines:

“Oh I cut his hair myself one night
A pair of dull scissors in the yellow light
And he told me that I'd done alright (is that sweet or what)
and kissed me 'til the mornin' light.”


“You are my sweetest downfall
I loved you first.”

By Your Side

Lover’s Rock

I originally heard this song on yet another episode of Sex and the City. In fact, it is the context in which this song is played that made me love this song more. In this episode, Samantha starts to fall for her boss (Richard) and Carrie felt grateful for her relationship with Aidan. (Makes me excited about the SATC Movie more and more). If this quote rings a bell, you’re in the same page with mine:

"That's the thing about needs. Sometimes when you get them met, you don't need them anymore."

Haven’t we all wished that there will be that special someone who won’t leave our side when we turn gray and old. Someone who will comfort us through the warmth, moreso through the cold. A special person who will be there to hold us tight, who will tell us we're right even though the world tells otherwise, who will see right through us, who will love us unconditionally. It is songs like this one that makes me optimistic about love and romance. That there is a special someone out there, that love indeed is possible, and a true romance is just around the corner… and then, it’s not so bad at all.

Maybe you’ve also heard this song in:

Sex and the City, Season 4, “The Good Fight”

Most memorable lines:

“Ohh, when you're cold
I'll be there, hold you tight to me

When you're on the outside

Baby, and you can't get in

I would show you

You're so much better than you know"


Somewhere Only We Know

Hopes and Fears

I detest 2pm-10pm shifts when I was working in the hospital. 10pm marks the end of duty but endorsements usually extends a whole deal of time. Tired and hungry, I usually leave the hospital 1am at least. And walking down the peaceful, quiet hallways, out into the cold, wintry streets, feeling the rushing of the wind on my face, watching leaves falling and sweeping down the street, sometimes with the occasional downpouring of rain, and walking the same path each and every day is such a nostalgic moment I could not express the bliss inside of me. For me, the street’s no stranger, the air is my friend, the street is my cradle, the wind—my music. I blend with nature till were no longer different, but one.

This is what I feel everytime I listen to this song. If there was a song that could ultimately sum up the events in my life as of present, it would be nothing else but this one. Everytime this song is played, melancholic thoughts fills my mind and puts me in such blissful nostalgia I could literally feel my body drifts into nothingness and pure weightlessness. It reminds me of a special place, a special emotion, a special time, a special feeling, a special person—it brings me to an inexplicable sense of happiness. It’s as if I’m comforted by the lines of the song. I guess it's in the lyrics, or in the melody, or in the meaning behind the spectacular wordplay that enthralls me and leaves me in awe. Perhaps I might never know, and the real meaning might still be obscure right now, but I know that someday I will, in a place somewhere only you and I know.

Maybe you’ve also heard this song in:
Grey’s Anatomy, Season 1, “The First Cut is the Deepest”
Finding Neverland, The Lake House, Scrubs, Cold Case, etc.
Also sung by Natasha Beddingfield, Blake Lewis, etc.

Most memorable lines:

Oh simple thing where have you gone
I'm getting old and I need something to rely on
So tell me when you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin

So if you have a minute why don't we go

Talk about it somewhere only we know?
This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go...
Somewhere only we know?”


There goes my top ten most loved, loved song (among the 3,967 in my iPod). May each line comfort your soul, nourish your spirit, renew your mind, and inspire you more and more every day. The real music, after all, is not always what is heard on your ears, but what is uttered in your heart.


P. S.
Runners-up include Garbage’s Tell Me Where It Hurts, Rickie Lee Jones’ On Saturday Afternoons in 1963, Jason Mraz’ You and I Both, Rhett Miller’s Come Around, MCR's Welcome to the Black Parade, Sarah Brightman's Dust in the Wind, and Gavin Degraw’s Follow Through. 10 songs (out of 3,967 or 0.003%) is really a few, god knows how hard it is to pick just a few.

Friday, July 27, 2007

Skin On Skin

Recently I had an epiphany. It was like I’m having role confusion all over again. Naah, it was not the top or bottom or versa thingie. But this time, I was thinking of my purpose here on blogosphere.

As a nurse, I have written less than five medical-related posts here and much too many entries relaying my emotional conundrums. Yeah I’m a nurse, and might not be a best example of one, but this post, YES, this post will eventually change the way people view The Unbearable Lightnessand will ultimately revolutionize the way you view the world.

Just kidding.

This is my take on BRINGING RELEVANT MEDICAL INFORMATION to all of you, my dear readers. Take note that this entry is not based on fictional stories, gossips and rumours! These posts are genuine as evidenced by research studies, publications and meta-analyses published in medical journals, etc.

My first post is about SOMETHING OF GLOBAL SIGNIFICANCE. It is about sex and whatnots. Read on…

Warning: The following article contains adult images and themes not suitable for younger children. Continue if you feel secure with this knowledge... blah blah. What the ... just read on.


Accidental condom inhalation.

Arya CL
, Gupta R, Arora VK.
Rai Speciality Hospital, Meerut, India.

A 27-year-old lady presented with persistent cough, sputum and fever for the preceding six months. Inspite of trials with antibiotics and anti-tuberculosis treatment for the preceeding four months, her symptoms did not improve. A subsequent chest radiograph showed non-homogeneous collapse-consolidation of right upper lobe.

Videobronchoscopy revealed an inverted bag like structure in right upper lobe bronchus and rigid bronchoscopic removal with biopsy forceps confirmed the presence of a condom. Detailed retrospective history also confirmed accidental inhalation of the condom during fellatio.

Condoms, anyone?

Research Article on PubMed Here:
Click Click Click!

Safety and Acceptability of the "Reality Condom" for Anal Sex Among Men Who Have Sex With Men.
Renzi C, Tabet SR, Stucky JA, Eaton N, Coletti AS, Surawicz CM, Agoff SN, Heagerty PJ, Gross M, Celum CL.
Department of Medicine, University of Washington, Seattle 98104, USA.

Wait wait!!! WTF is a "Reality Condom?" Reality condom, similar to a female condom, is a polyurethane sheathe, almost like a latex condom, but is a loose one. It is to be inserted in the rectal vault prior to anal intercourse. Research article below.

This study aimed to assess safety and acceptability of Reality condoms for anal sex among men who have sex with men. A crossover study among HIV-seroconcordant (33 HIV-negative and 5 HIV-positive) monogamous male couples, randomized to latex male and Reality condom use with anal sex was done.

Slippage with removal was reported more frequently with Reality than male latex condoms. Receptive partners more frequently reported pain or discomfort (OR, 5.0; 95% CI, 2.6-9.4) and rectal bleeding (OR, 1.9; 95% CI, 0.9-4.1) with Reality condoms than male condoms. Over 20% reported willingness to use the Reality condom in the future with a partner of unknown HIV status; willingness was associated with past problems with male condoms and no problems with Reality condoms among receptive partners, and with past use of Reality condoms and HIV seropositivity among insertive partners.

Men reported more frequent problems with Reality condoms than male latex condoms used for anal intercourse, particularly slippage, discomfort, and rectal bleeding. Design modifications, training, and research on the clinical significance of safety outcomes are needed for use of Reality condoms with anal sex.

Reality condoms, anyone?

Research Article on PubMed Here: Click Click Click!

Comments anyone?


More more medical investigations in the next post, including but not limited to missing royalties, including the infamous Prince Albert, tubes going everywhere, tumors exploding, and the perils of lovemaking.
Be afraid. Be very afraid. Just kidding. Hehehe

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

100 Years (My 50th post)

Like a tenderly loving mother, I conceived this blog like a personal child into my womb of consciousness. I conceptualized a personal sanctuary for my little, unborn fetus, whose bright future remains to be seen. I promised to nurture this brainchild of mine into this beautiful world of peace, tranquility and serenity.

Almost three years have passed, and several painful and satisfying experiences later, comes my 50th post, to which I am celebrating with this current entry.

This blogger world is a cosmos of uncertainty. A lot of good writers have perished—reaching the zenith at an inopportune time and falling down into the abyss of literary inferno. The Unbearable Lightness is no exception. Several times I have remained in hiatus due to my studies, work schedule and brain drain. In fact, it is only recently that I have become more productive than ever, producing atleast 18 beautifully-written (in my own opinion) entries in the past two months, almost one-third of the total posts in my site so far.

In fact I would have reached the 50th post earlier if it weren’t for my deleted posts after I learn that some of my professors (and family members) do visit my site, but this post is extremely important to me nonetheless. I would like to take a walk down memory lane and revisit some of my most-loved posts, in this special entry of “The Unbearable Lightness of Being.”

1. Unwritten/Irreplaceable.

This is one of my funniest entries so far. This is what 2-years of celibacy, coupled with repressed emotions and an inappropriately-timed trance could do to a gullible person like me. Written in medical-ese, this will remain as one of my most cherished post ever.

2. As The Sun Stood Still.

On the other side of the spectrum, As The Sun Stood Still is the most emotional, melancholic, depressing, gloomy and poignant piece that I have written for the past 2 years. Rereading this post, which is dedicated to My Beloved Special Someone who left for the States for good, never fails to bring me to tears. Yup, two years have passed and the emotions written there still touch my heart and soul, still genuine and sincere, haunting me till time immemorial.

3. A New Day Has Come.

The first step”—it’s all that it takes. And when it’s all good and done, the view of the other side... is spectacular.

As my “moving on” post, this is my most inspiring, empowering entry after several break-ups, entering into wrong relationships, and painful personal tragedies have happened in my life. Reading this entry brings a little smile to my face, that there is still hope, and there is always a chance to be happy, no matter how scarce it might seem to be.

4. Some Hearts.

“Everyone has a purpose on this earth, and I think you have found yours” is one phrase I want to hear, even once in my lifetime. This post is dedicated to everyone whose hearts have been broken and have been given a second chance to beat again. This entry inspires us to make the most of our second chances, to realize that heartaches are never the end but are new beginnings, and to learn to find even a little time to listen to ourselves and to our heart’s dictates.

5. Song Beneath The Song

This post lists the Ten Things I Love About Myself, a potpourri of blessings I am truly proud of and won’t ever exchange for anything else in this world. It took me quite some time to realize how blessed I was with such wonderful gifts, and I hope reading this one will definitely make you feel the same way too.

There they are, some of my most meaningful posts so far. My only wish is that with the continued support of people who reads this site, no matter how painful it is to read all my ranting and complaints, you can find a piece of solace, joy, or comfort written within the lines of my posts. That in this way, I could be proud to say that this blog, indeed, has a purpose, and I have found it in you.

Cheers and congratulations to all of us!


P. S. Thank you, my dear readers, for your continued support. Rest assured that my next 50, 100 or 1,000 posts will be meaningful ones, and this site as essential and relevant for me, and for you as well. God bless us best. (Images from Flickr).

Sunday, July 22, 2007

Guy Love (And So Much More)

I’m taking this musical theme to higher limits with this “melodiacal” (as opposed to my last maniacal) entry. So read on.

Scrubs, one of my most loved medical-related series, never fails to impress me with such wonderful episodes. This time, they took medical dramedy into greater heights with their Emmy-nominated episode “My Musical. This, in my opinion, is the most entertaining, melancholic, nostalgic episode from this beautifully-written series. Such wonderful, wonderful show.

My Musical follows Patti Miller, a woman who had a short syncopal episode (fainting spell) and mysteriously starts hearing incessant music from the staff of the Sacred Heart Hospital. Diagnostic work-ups were done and a cranial CT revealed the reason why she hears everyone’s speech as singing—an aneurysm (ballooning or outpouching of a weakened part of the blood vessel) was present, and is nearing a rupture in the brain’s Temporal Lobe, the part of the brain that interprets language and hearing (auditory processing).

She underwent surgery and when she awakens, she finds that the surgery was a success. She no longer hears singing. J.D. reflects in voiceover that after having made a choice, we may miss the way things were; as Elliot realizes she misses her roommate, Carla realizes she misses her daughter, and Ms. Miller realizes she misses the music.*

One of the highlights of this episode is J.D. and Turk’s performance of “Guy Love,” a song that reflects their “unique friendship,” characterized by, as the title implies, “a guy love between two guys.”

Note: TSFW (Totally Safe for Work)

And as J.D. concludes: “In musicals, there's always a happy ending, but, in life, sometimes when you get what you want, you end up missing what you left behind. Whether it's your roommate, or time spent with your child, or even the music you used to hear, in your head.

Sad but true.


Complete Episode of Scrub’s "My Musical" Here (Part One) and Here (Part Two).

Scrubs images from Summary of "My Musical" from here, and from Wikipedia here.

My Fearless Forecasts for the 59th Annual Primetime Emmy Awards in the next, next post.

Complete list of 2007 Annual Primetime Emmy Award Nominees here.

Partial lyrics of Guy Love here.

Saturday, July 21, 2007


The long wait is over.

2 years of celibacy, a promiscuity-laden slumber, and a great deal of entering into wrong relationships, comes the end of the drought.

The dry spell is finally over.

In line of the barrage of music-related themes comes my current emotional underpinning epitomized by the Barbadian beauty Rihanna's uber-hit Umbrella.

Rihanna (in white dress) and the water scene is phenomenal. Loves it!

I am soaking wet, I desperately need an umbrella.



P. S. Congratulatory messages will be very very very much appreciated.

P. P. S. Details about how the author got wet to be posted in the next entries.

P. P. P. S. The entry regarding my top five musical pieces will be posted in a week. Be patient, be very patient. Hehehe

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

They'll Never Know (1st of 2 Parts)

First there were movies, then this post.

When I was in middle school, music examinations practically involve either (1) playing an instrument or (2) singing in front of the class (or worse, sometimes doing both at the same time). My music professor was never a fan of the Socratic Method. For her, the only options are to sing or be abominated to oblivion.

On our first quiz, all of us sang our High School Hymn, of course, with my professor playing the piano. The second quiz entails singing the University Hymn (yup, they’re different), still her playing the piano. Another year passed and it became our turn to play the piano while she dictates to us the octaves, etc etc.; with a group concert-like presentation as the finale. My group mates sang “Love Is All That Matters,” while yours truly played the piano.

From there started my ambivalent feelings of love and hate to music.

Few years passed and several ego-defense mechanisms thereafter, my liking for music sublimated into my illogical attachments to iPods and MP3 players. I have witnessed the transformation of iPod from a white, bulky, block-like apparatus (which I never owned) to the iPod Mini (I have one in pink), to the iPod Nano (I bought the 1st generation unit in white), and at present the iPod Video (30 Gigabytes in Black). And yup, I’m thinking on joining the iPhone bandwagon, but that’s another story.

Before I divert away from the main topic, this post, by the way, is dedicated to the artists, either individually or collectively, whose songs have inspired, shaped, mould, stirred, moved, stimulated, and motivated me throughout times and ages.
The songs presented thereto hold very special place in my life and will forever be in My Top Rated iTunes list until time immemorial. Read on, as most of them reflect the person in me, and my mood as of the moment.

Here goes my top picks:

Wreck of the Day

Anna Nalick
Wreck of the Day

Everytime I listen to Anna Nalick’s songs, I couldn’t help break out in tears.
After her uber-successful song Breathe (2 AM), Wreck of the Day proves to be equally better for this poignant, melancholic singer-songwriter. Wreck… is a song about someone who lost a loved one, a special person who taught him how to love and hope unconditionally. With his leaving, she was left wrecked and astray.

ne could imagine this song playing (a) with a girl looking over at her loved one’s coffin or (b) a person completely heartbroken just driving off somewhere. Either way, a short cathartic cry after listening to this song is always therapeutic.

Maybe you’ve also heard this song in:

Grey’s Anatomy, Season 2, “Superstition”

Breathe (2 AM) played on Grey’s Anatomy, Season 2, “As We Know It”

ost memorable lines:

"Desperately close to a coffin of hope

I'd cheat destiny just to be near you
If this is giving up, then I'm giving up
On love.”


"Cause love doesn't hurt so I know I'm not falling in love
I'm just falling to pieces.” (ouch)

James Blunt

Back to Bedlam

James’ first hit, “You’re Beautiful” gathered a mixed bag of reactions ranging from inspiring to annoying.
I, personally, loved the song and I even thought that it was beautifully written, it is teeming with emotional undertones, and even intoxicating at times. James’ High proves to be equally disturbing, comforting I mean. From the lyrics, to the rhythm, up to James’ haunting, lingering voice, this song is such a musical masterpiece.

One could imagine this song playing
with a person running carefree in a daffodil field, or in a beach at sundown or (b) while you are sleeping with the person you truly love.
From what I know, James Blunt’s present songs will surely, definitely be tomorrow’s endless classics.

aybe you’ve also heard this song in:
Grey’s Anatomy, Season 2, “Much Too Much”

Most memorable lines:

“But now I'm high; running wild among all the stars above.
Sometimes it's hard to believe you remember me.”


Robbie Williams

Life Thru A Lens

I promised myself that when I die,
never in any circumstance would sad, sappy, gloomy songs be played on my funeral.
In fact I have listed some songs I would like to be played when that time comes, and this song comes first (the next to my list are James Blunt’s Goodbye My Lover, Michael Jackson’s Gone Too Soon, U2’s With or Without You, among others).

There is a longing sense of sadness every time I hear this song or whenever I watch Robbie walking along the hayfields in solitary in this video. Alongside Better Man, Strong, and She’s The One, no song is more compelling, more enchanting, more enthralling, than that of Robbie’s Angels. And no, Jessica Simpson’s version does not count.

Maybe you’ve also heard this song in:

Most memorable lines:

“And as the feeling grows
She breathes flesh to my bones
And when love is dead
I’m loving angels instead.”

Love for Real


Eat at Whitey’s

My love for Sex and the City, as all of you would have known, will eternally last until the last term of the axiom of Infinity be determined, or probably until man has discovered how dinosaurs were extinguished here on earth.
My veneration for this show literally spans into epic proportions and this post, this post, and this post, will bear witness to the marriage I committed with the ladies of the city of New York.

My love for this show will never be complete without my parallel liking to its music.
I first heard this song on one of the episodes in this series during my SATC marathons years ago. Recently, I tried to research what the title of the song was and eureka, like Archimedes discovering the principles of hydrostatics, I found the title of the song in the SATC website itself.

This song was played when Carrie first saw Aidan at his bar opening after their break-up.
If this quote rings a bell, then consider yourself a co-worshipper;

"I had confronted my ghost. I had accepted and released it. But now I was more haunted than ever. Because what I felt all along was no ghost…
it was real.

Maybe you’ve also heard this song in:
Sex and the City, Season 4, “Ghost Town”

Most memorable lines:

“She helped to easy my pain
She stand in pourin’ rain
She taught me how to love…
do you want to be a love for real
yes I want to be a love for real”

They’ll Never Know

Ross Copperman

Welcome to Reality

There are good songs.
And there are great ones. And there is a huge, huge difference between the two. For instance, Jewel’s Break Me, Mono’s Life in Mono, Bjork’s All is Full of Love, Mika’s My Interpretation, and Corinne Bailey Rae’s Put Your Records On are good songs. Then comes Ross Copperman’s They’ll Never Know, and then you’ll know the difference.

The enthralling sound of the first strokes of piano being played on this song would be enough to convince every listener how saturated with such powerful, passionate emotions this song intrinsically possesses.
Aptly entitled They’ll Never Know, this song is about finding acceptance, solace, peace, comfort, and serenity in the arms of a person who is willing to accept a person despite his flaws, brokenness, incompleteness and imperfections. In this world of rejection and mediocrity, one could only hope that unconditional love be not only found in the lyrics of this song.

Maybe you’ve also heard this song in:
One Tree Hill, Season 4 Finale, “All of a Suddenly I Miss Everyone”

Most memorable lines:

“Cause all that you are
Is beautiful child
But they’ll never know
They’ll never know.”






P.S. Top 5 songs to follow in my next post (will probably be finished in a day or two). Apple iPhone image from, song albums from iTunes. No promotions implied.